Feminism isn't Just for Women - Really!

If you have engaged in any way with Feminism in the last decade you've likely come across the term intersectionality. As a huge part of the newest wave of Feminism, intersectionality takes on the reality that no issue occurs in a vacuum. Nobody has only one identity and they all interact and overlap, but this idea still has many who are less involved in Feminism baffled. Thus, all too often you hear claims from MRAs that Feminism only cares about women. The recent Russell Tovey controversy presents an opportune moment to debunk this defeatist attitude.

The Biggest Problem With Men's Rights Is The Men's Rights Movement

The words "Men's Rights Activist" have become a shorthand for the stereotype of a fedora-wearing misogynist who spends most of his days trolling websites, shouting the word "femi-nazis," and man-splaining all over the place. Unfortunately for these staunch supporters of Men's Rights, they've gone and completely destroyed whatever credibility the Men's Rights movement may have had. There are certainly issues that men face which are not given main stream attention, however, most of these stem from our patriarchal society's insistence on strict gender roles. Toxic masculinity is a symptom of the patriarchy, which we feminist have been harping on about for a few generations now.

First Conviction for California's 'Revenge Porn' Law

Originally posted on Inherently Human

California’s new ‘revenge porn’ law has seen its first conviction this month and it’s starting a firestorm of conversation on the internet. Officials are hailing the conviction as a victory with Los Angelos City Attorney Mike Feuer stating, “California’s new revenge porn law gives prosecutors a valuable tool to protect victims whose lives and reputations have been upended by a person they once trusted.” State Senator and author of the law Anthony Cannella says, “I am happy to see my legislation doing what it’s supposed to do — protecting victims.”

While this official praise is strong and positive, the law has had critics from its inception. The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) was initially critical of the bill(and revenge porn laws in general) citing loose wording as an issue along with a concern for such regulation on free speech. Still, Feuer claims this conviction is sending a strong message to the people that such “malicious behavior will not be tolerated.”

Sadly, the sentiment expressed in response to this conviction has not been nearly as optimistic. Overwhelmingly people are looking to find someone other than the man to blame. Too often the adage, “maybe if you didn’t take naked photos this wouldn’t have happened,” is cited. It would seem that reservations about the effectiveness of such laws are justified.

At least a partial defence of such laws could be that they are still in their infancy. Only 12 states have passed laws on revenge porn; maybe as more adopt similar policies we will see a change in attitudes. More likely though is that the attitude will remain pervasive like victim blaming still is despite rape laws being almost universal.

The victim blaming is only part of the problem with revenge porn laws. But as the conversation grows, we need to be mindful of the way we approach these topics. As they are considered in more jurisdictions, including the UK, we have a renewed opportunity to challenge this narrative and to finally bring the law on this matter into the 21st century.

Re Rose McGowan and Gay Misogyny

Rose McGowan has gotten a lot of attention in the past few days for some comments she made on the Bret Easton Ellis Podcast about the LGBT*Q community. Her comments sparked a lot of outrage online and within the community (including my own) while raising awareness about some issues - although maybe that was unintentional.

Metrosexual to Spornosexual: An exploration of 'male' gender

Mark Simpson - 'Father of the Metrosexual'

Metrosexuality has always been a topic I've avoided. Its a term that was thrown into the public sphere and endorsed by many, but hardly understood by those who used it. In the past I found it to be wholly uninteresting. Straight men obsessing about their looks and their clothes? Not really my area of interest.

This week, I attended a talk by 'the father of the metrosexual' -the man who coined the term- Mark Simpson. Admittedly I wasn't expecting much, but the talk turned out to be extremely enlightening and intriguing.

Coming Out Isn't the End

This post comes in the wake of national coming out day:

Its been a long time since I've been 'in the closet'. Like many people who have a closet they've had to come out of, I still remember vividly what it was like to be in it; lonely, quiet, and full of fear. Always looking over your shoulder, hoping not to be caught. Every free moment of thought consumed by your secret. Its really not pleasant, obviously.

Being 'out' is truly liberating. Talking to almost any LGBT*Q person would probably make that abundantly clear. For me, its been 6 years of a (mostly) great experience. I have been proud, and loud, and many people who know me can attest to that - in case this blog didn't make it clear enough. During my time in California this summer though, a funny thing happened... I seemed to have been placed back into a closet.

The Victim Culture Myth

Anyone who has been involved in social justice has heard this excuse: "that just causes people to have a victim complex" or "that just creates a victim culture." Those words are the bane of my existence. They strike at the very core of why I am so adamant about creating conversations and change.

Hearing those words for the first time - thrown up in defense of some ridiculous position - it made me feel like I had been oppressing the people I was trying to help, that I might be encouraging such weakness. Of course the more I thought about it, the more ridiculous it sounds. How is discouraging people from doing wrongs encouraging weakness? How could encouraging people to speak out when they are being bullied or abused take power from them? Frankly, it does not.

This argument relies on us equating victimhood with being weak, it turns the tables and says that you are taking power from people and that isn't something any activist wants. But that never is the case. Victims are strong. And they become stronger when we allow and encourage them to speak out and help themselves.

I am not a victim myself (except maybe to society's ignorance). I haven't been abused, nor was I bullied in school, but I've met victims and survivors and they are some of the most amazing people I have ever encountered. They are brave, and kind, and can see wonder in the little things.

'Victim culture' and 'victim complex' arguments take away all of their power, and credit. It demeans their accomplishments and it silences their voices. It demands that they hide so that the rest of us can feel better about the world in which we pretend to live. It's not only victim blaming but also victim shaming, which is so much worse. To have such disregard as to the many emotions that are coupled with victimhood and then to add shame on top of it all is so insensitive it's almost inhuman.

We as a society need to relearn what it means to be a victim and recognize which part of victimization is truly bad. Its not being a victim which is negative, but victimizing others. So please, lets stop demonizing victims and start shining the light on the guilty parties.